Mother’s Intuition?

I wrote the following post nearly a year ago, but never got around to sharing it. 

I started 2015 with a long list of things to accomplish – complete a home study, move, rent or sell my townhouse, and take Felix to visit extended family. They were all sort of expensive and time consuming goals, but there were so many variables, so I sort of just went for it and took each project step by step.

I knew that getting the call to adopt was a long shot so soon, but it would throw off my plans to buy a new house or visit relatives, so “just in case”, I got busy on my list. In January I did the home study, in March I found the house, we closed the day before our trip in April, and I found a renter for my townhouse a week after that. So far, so good.

Then the house projects started. I had the carpet replaced, tore out all the junk the previous owners left behind (random shelves, ugly curtains), weeded the yard, bought and assembled a mower and mowed the lawn, had the trees pruned, washed and stained the fence, planned a yard sale…and I had to keep telling myself to relax, that I wasn’t up against any deadline. I hope to be in this house for 10+ years. Still, it was hard to take a night off.

On Wednesday I took a moment at work to straighten up my office, and as I clipped dead flowers off my lilies, my mind wandered. What if the attorney called TODAY with a baby? What if all I had to do was drive downtown to pick him or her up at the hospital? I thought through what that would mean at work, for my intern starting next week, for the house projects…

I sat back down at my desk and started working on a project. My cell phone rang. It was the adoption agency. I was sure they were going to ask about my update for Felix’s birth mom, which I’m embarrassed to say was overdue because of the trip and moving.

“We have a situation here that you might be interested in.” Okay…heart racing, I remember very little of what was said, but thankfully I scribbled notes on a scrap of paper. They needed my profile book in the next 30 minutes, the expectant mom (emom) is due in a month and she’s going to deliver at the hospital downtown. No way!

So I postponed a meeting with my boss and the company president, raced home for the profile copy I’d kept for myself and ran it over to the agency just in the nick of time. I was a total ball of nerves until my phone rang again about 24 hours later – again, I can’t remember what was said, but I got the gist of it. They loved Felix’s smile and could tell he was so happy, and that did it for them. (Emom enlisted the help of her mother and teenage son to choose the family.) Eek!

I closed my office door, cried a few tears, and then had to drive home to meet some mattress delivery people. I called Carter’s and reserved a Big Brother shirt in 3T, which Felix and I picked up after work before making the rounds to tell family. It was priceless watching each person eventually notice Felix’s shirt and put 2 and 2 together.

We are all just blown away that a match happened so fast again this time, but maybe deep down I knew? For the record, my sister-in-law claims she knew it wouldn’t take long.

A Day in the Life

I've been inspired by my blogger friends to document a full, ordinary day. I'll try to do the same date ever year to see how things change.


Wednesday, February 24th 2016


6:30 AM – Alarm goes off, 15 minutes earlier than usual because it’s Wednesday and I will need to leave work early to get Felix to dance class. Hit snooze anyway.

6:39 AM – Get up. Remy’s awake so I change his diaper and put him on the living room floor with some toys. Feed the pets and restart the dryer so last night’s damp load can finish drying. Head to the kitchen, where I realize I’m out of half and half and remember I’ll be spending most of the day working off site, so I don’t make myself coffee or pack a lunch. Let the dog out to go potty.

6:45 AM – Raise Remy’s walker up a notch so he can’t reach the ground with his feet, after the previous day’s incident of him scooting up to my bathroom counter and grabbing a mildly hot curling iron. I put him back in my room in the walker with some Kix and take my toiletries to the boys’ bathroom on the other side of the house. There’s been a giant spider lurking in my shower but I can never find it when I’ve worked up the nerve to get rid of it. He waits till I’m all soaped up to jump out at me.

6:50 AM – Shower quickly while repeatedly peeking out the shower curtain to make sure Remy isn’t choking. Thankfully I have a clear line of vision from the boys’ bathroom to my bedroom.

7:00 AM – Felix is up. I turn on the Today Show, take off his soggy overnight diaper and ask what he wants for breakfast. He chooses waffles. So I stand in the kitchen in towels while toasting two blueberry Eggos under the broiler. Give Felix waffles and milk, then check the dryer and put his clean dance shirt in his backpack by the back door (packed dance shoes, shorts and Remy’s stuff last night). Take my clean items and lay them on the edge of the pack n play so they don’t wrinkle.

7:15 AM – Do makeup, then move Remy to the doorway jumper in my closet for a little variety.

7:25 AM – Dry and curl hair. At some point, Felix finishes breakfast and joins us in the bedroom. He spends a lot of mornings playing in my walk-in closet because there’s a small table and he can be near Remy.

7:45 AM – Time to get myself dressed. I choose a company shirt so I won’t make people uncomfortable when I poke around the site of our new clinic taking pictures.

7:55 AM – Time to change and dress Remy. Felix follows me into his room and excitedly announces “My turn!” when Remy’s ready. We all head to Felix’s room. The dog is now hiding in my bedroom. She knows it’s almost time to go and doesn’t want to go into her kennel.

8:05 AM – We’re done dressing Felix and start looking for shoes. I put Remy in his car seat and he starts to act hungry, so I make him a bottle. Put Felix’s shoes on, and drag/carry the dog to her kennel.

8:15 AM – Load up the car and head to daycare, about 3 minutes away. Drop off boys.

8:40 AM – Stop for gas, coffee and a donut. A couple of guys are also getting coffee and one starts teasing the other about all the hazelnut creamers he’s adding. I also love hazelnut creamer so I stick up for him and we totally win the argument about what’s normal and what’s not. I leave the gas station feeling relieved the conversation didn’t end with any unwanted looks or comments.

9 – 1:30 PM – On site at our new clinic, which isn’t open yet. It’s fun, but I never feel very productive because I spend most of my time overseeing signage installation. I offer to help and end up getting tiny metal cuts all over the fingers. I get some nice exterior shots despite construction debris everywhere.

1:30 PM – Stop for lunch before heading back to the office for a 2:00 meeting. Fast food, but I get a small drink and no fries to minimize the damage.

2:00 PM – Meeting canceled. Back in my office, I’m struck by how dreary it is because my window is boarded up due to construction here as well. Realize how nice it was to spend the morning in a sunny fresh building. Spend the afternoon working on projects mostly related to the new clinic and eating a few Girl Scout Cookies. Make mental note to take them home.

4:47 PM – Realize I’m already running late for dance and force close all my computer programs so I can log off.

5:10 PM – Arrive at daycare. Felix is disappointed to see me because I accidentally took his backpack into daycare that morning, so he thought grandpa was picking him up. (I always pack that same backpack for grandpa). Felix is appeased by the reminder of dance class so he happily gets in the car anyway.

5:15 PM – Arrive at dance class. Change Felix's clothes and let him play in the “kiddie korner” till class starts.

5:33 PM – Class has started and Felix is safely inside the studio. They allow parents to leave, so I tell a friend I’m running to Walmart in case Felix comes looking for me.

5:38 PM – Arrive at Walmart and pick up half and half, soap and a container of baby puffs.

6 PM – Back at the dance studio. I let Remy out of his car seat so he can eat puffs and play with the other kids.

6:17 PM – Leaving dance class. Alert on my phone reminds me to make tacos with the black beans I opened two days ago. I mentally think through what else I have – ripe avocado and tomato, yes! Realize I’m really hungry.

6:25 PM – Arrive home. Bring in the garbage and recycle bins from yesterday’s pick up, and get the mail before unloading the boys. Happy to see our Carter’s order arrived.

6:30 PM – Let dog out of her kennel, feed the pets. Put Remy on the living room floor with some toys. Felix immediately starts playing with a cardboard race track and cars. I start the taco beans, dice the tomato and avocado and put shells in the oven to warm. While the beans are simmering, Felix and I go through the Carter’s shipment item by item. Thankfully everything fits and it’s all super cute. Remy eats at least 3 tags and tries to grab a plastic bag during this time.

6:45 PM – Eating dinner together. I feed Remy half an avocado and some baby food while Felix and I eat tacos. I give Felix two Thin Mints after dinner and he’s in heaven.

7:15 PM – Remy’s playing on the floor and I decide to change into pajamas and clean up the living room. Also freshen my Valentine’s Day bouquet of flowers by rinsing the vase, pulling out the wilted ones and giving the other stems a fresh cut. My finger starts bleeding again so Felix lets me use one of his Band-Aids and assures me America will help me feel better. (Captain America)

7:30 PM – Felix snuggles up next to me on the couch and he stinks. Decide he needs a bath. He gleefully runs to the bathroom and strips. I realize the cat has peed in the tub again (I thought we broke him of that habit!) so I clean with a scrubby Lysol wipe.

7:35 PM – Felix is playing in the tub, which I can see from the living room, so I decide this is a good time to go over some of the 9 month ASQ items on the paperwork from Remy’s pediatrician. He won’t be 9 months for another 2 ½ weeks, but he surprises me by doing almost everything in all the categories. I’m most surprised to see him hand me a toy when I ask for it. Such a sweet and smart little guy.

8:00 PM – Remy is acting tired so I make him a bottle and he falls asleep in his bouncy chair. I wash Felix’s hair, wrap him in his monster towel and carry him to my room where I dry his hair and find a pair of clean pajamas in the pile of laundry from this morning.

8:15 PM – I make Felix a steamer and he snuggles up next to me on the couch to read some books. The stink is still there, so I figure it’s the couch and make a mental note to watch the cushion covers this weekend.

8:40 PM – Felix is in my bed with teeth brushed, and he falls asleep pretty quickly. (We’ve been cosleeping ever since the flood in 2014 forced us to bedshare for a month.) I wash my face and then eat some cereal while watching crap on TV I don’t care about.

9 – 10:30 PM – I play Words with Friends and watch TV.

10:30 PM – Change Remy and move him into my room. I move my laundry and put him in the Pack N Play but he immediately starts thrashing around and fussing. He’s waking more and more with every second that passes. I decide our sleep is more important than the transition, so I put him in his Rock N Play where he immediately falls back asleep.


11:05 PM – After prepping Remy’s night bottles and responding to a couple of my online threads that have escalated (religion and reproductive rights), I turn off my light and go to sleep.


1:30 AM – Remy wakes up to dream feed (eat without waking fully).


4:30 AM – Another dream feed.


6:45 AM – We do it all again!