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| Yes, I wish it grew on trees! |
Let me preface this post by saying I had an awesome Halloween weekend and I won the funniest costume award at work today, so things aren't all bad.
I have to admit that so far, the adoption process has gone relatively smoothly for me. So I guess it’s only fair I get a taste of the frustration other adoptive parents have experienced.
1. I learned that 2011 is the final year the adoption tax credit will be refundable. This means that if I adopt in 2012, the amount of taxes I owe could be reduced to $0, but after that, I won’t get anything back. People who adopt this year can get the full $13k even if they don’t owe any taxes.
2. If I decide to pay the agency’s waiting list fee of $2,000, I need to do it this year so I can be sure I get it back as a tax refund. But I can’t ask for it until I file my 2012 taxes (random rule.)
3. But wait. Without the $13k tax refund, I can only afford the minimum adoption budget of $15k (and that may be a stretch.) And on that budget, CASI can only network with 3 other agencies for me. Do I want to pay $2,000 so they can network with just 3 agencies on my behalf?
4. Contrary to what I was told before, the agency is now telling me that my roommate will need to meet with the caseworker in person and there will be a $150 fee to amend my home study. This is NOT what I was told before I paid the home study fee. Grr. My roommate is only in town for 2 more months on business, and having to pay for her to be there would be a huge bummer. I'm already having to foot the bill for her background checks for ID and MT.
Grr!
Who can we write to or petition to get an extension on that tax credit? It seems like right now is a terrible, terrible time to make adoption more difficult, and I can't imagine any political party coming out against it publicly.
ReplyDeleteThe credit was already extended as part of Obama's health care reform, so the past couple of years have been an exception. After 2012, the credit drops back to a non-refundable $5k.
ReplyDeleteSo I don't know if there's any chance it could be re-extended. Not sure who to ask.
Wow. This is disappointing news. As an intended mother in a surrogacy arrangement, I will be adopting my child to transfer parentage. I was looking forward to this tax break. :(
ReplyDeleteIt's odd - I fully researched this credit over the summer and fall, and until Friday night, hadn't read a THING saying it was non-refundable after 2011. But that is indeed the case according to the IRS website.
ReplyDeleteThe Adoption Tax Credit was always only intended to be until December of 2011 and it was a HUGE hurdle to get it this far (read more here: Adoption Tax Credit Extended and Improved|Creating a Family http://bit.ly/w4fbXZ). And, it's not a slam-dunk that you get it the same year you file -- I have friends who have been waiting, like me, for upwards of three years to see it. This was always a nice gesture, for me, but never anything I counted on as an adoptive mom (sorry for the lousy honesty ... )
ReplyDeleteFor your home study and room-mate, could you just wait two months until she moves out and then re-toss your hat back into the collective ring (so to speak)? It's two additional months to save money, which seems to be front and center right now, and in the bigger picture, it's a small amount of time to delay. It's too bad they weren't forthcoming about that piece -- any adult who resides in the home needs to be part of the homestudy (especially for the background checks).
Hang in there -- I think the one thing to take away from this is that adoption at it's core is bittersweet. It's a road filled with bumps, bruises -- and love and joy. And not just the waiting period, but life beyond adoption is as well. I wouldn't give any moment away or change one moment in the five years it took for me to be an adoptive mom -- or one moment in the five years since I've become a momma to my amazing girl. The struggle then is different than the bittersweet moments of now ... all of it part of the journey for both me and for my daughter as we grow together.
Have faith. It will happen when it's time, when the universe is ready and likely when you least expect it. I found when I let go and let it take it's course, amazing things happened.
:) h (single adoptive momma to m ... my ray of sunshine)
Thanks for chiming in.
ReplyDeleteWhat frustrates me about the tax credit is all the info out there that didn't mention it would go from refundable to non-refundable between 2011 and 2012.
I went over the roommate situation in detail with the agency before I paid the home study fee. I will have to pay another $400 next August to renew it, so I don't want to sit out for two months because of the agency's error. (I have in writing what I was initially told.) I'm also not going to throw my roommate out on the street. And really, the $350 a month I get from her isn't a drop in the bucket compared to what adoption will cost. But I would like to have a roommate right up until I adopt, so I can save up that money for maternity leave, diapers, etc.
I don't know anything about the adoption process, in the US or Canada (where I live), but if your room mate isn't going to be a room mate when you adopt, why is she included in the home study? Is it b/c she is currently in your home? Hi Monica, it's Lisa Rebecca from choice moms...you can also follow my blog.
ReplyDeleteThat's really bad news. I've got some other friends working towards adoption on a very tight budget, and this is going to be awful for them as well. I just don't get why adoption has to cost so much money, it's ridiculous. Well, all I can say is I'm sorry for this MAJOR frustration.
ReplyDeleteI don't understand how "placement fees" vary so much based on race when agencies are supposed to be non-profit. Does it really cost twice as much to do the paperwork for a non-white baby?
ReplyDeleteNon-profit does not always equal ethical nor does it mean they still don't make money, it's just that they can't show a profit. The biggest part of this whole thing is that domestic adoptions are NOT regulated in the US. So, really, it's whatever an agency can charge and get folks to pay and what the "market" is requesting (and, yep, white baby girls are the most wanted, children of color, less desirable and 'cheaper' - disgusting, isn't it?). I'm the white adoptive mother to a Latina daughter and there's a whole layer of "stuff" that gets added in as well there too -- too much to write here -- but racism is alive and well (even if you think it's not, it is) and the road she'll have to travel as an adopted child of color isn't easy.
ReplyDeleteI'd urge you to look further into more information on ethical adoptions. Ethica is the most amazing information, resource and advocacy group out there for domestic and international adoptions, with the exception of foster-adopt. (http://www.ethicanet.org/) I'm involved with them on their board, the president of their board is a dear friend and I do volunteer work for them on the foster-adopt front. If you want to speak to Rachel directly about domestic agencies, as she knows which do the most ethical work out there, let me know and I'll get you in touch with each other.
Thanks, mama, I will visit that site!
ReplyDelete